Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Oh that kind of Thong....

Today was a thong day. Not the foot thongs - those hurt my tender feet. It's been almost 6 months since I've worn a thong. I would pine after them in my undie drawer waiting for the day I could wear my thong.

A little back history. I had surgery over a year ago to reduce or totally eliminate a fibroid tumor. For those who don't know of fibroids, these tumors are benign growths that can cause extreme cramps, heavy bleeding and humongous clots (so big it use to scare me in to thinking I was hemorrhaging.). Anyway, after the surgery which involved two lovely vials of morphine (and since I’m not a drug addict the use of morphine for pain was not going to make me crave it after the medication wore off) that put me in la-la land for a couple of days saying strange things and making everyone watch Survivor while I buzzed away, I finally had pain free, clot free, low flow monthlys.

The only issue to resolve was I still had to wear panty liners for most of the month. UGH – no thongs. Panty liners for thongs are a joke. So French cut bikinis would have to do. French cut bikinis show lines – UGH. French cut bikinis don’t make me feel sexy or girlie – UGH. French cut bikinis are only for monthlys not everyday use - UGH day after day. So when I complained to my gyno she suggested my hormones were out of whack and the fibroid was still there. I had a couple of choices - another kind of surgery (while the thought of more morphine is appealling the pain you have to go through was not) or to try birth control pills for a few months.

So for the first time in over 25 years I went back on the pill. I went off the pill many years ago because I only wanted to take medication when it is absolutely necessary. Well the first thing I noticed was I craved carbs. Why couldn't I get the kind of pill that suppressed your appetite? - UGH. I couldn’t get enough French fries, bread, rice, or potato chips – UGH. I told myself, I missed my thongs. Endure I told myself. Patience. I stayed on the pill for 5 months.

This was my first month pillless. Today was a thong day –YEAH. I can’t wait for tomorrow.



Paperback Writer said...

Sorry Two Roads, but I have to totally disagree with you about thongs!


Two Roads said...

Practice - it takes 1 week and then it feels like you are wearing nothing. Which I would wear nothing but when I go without it always feel like sweat dripping down my leg. So I run to the bathroom and nothing - dry as can be. What's with that?

So try it, you'll love it! No lines either!

laurie said...

Jody! I followed your link on Neil's site, you are too funny ... and I have to agree with you on the Thong Issue. Although I once heard Stacey London from 'What Not To Wear' say that boy-cut panties are another option for avoiding VPLs. I haven't tried it because I'm not sure there's enough room in a boy-leg panty to cover this jelly, alas.

Two Roads said...

Laurie, thanks for coming over to check me out. As for the boy-leg panties for women - I think Neil should check them out since he likes female undies. This would enable him to be a man and get the feel of a woman at the same time! I think then he can take that picture that all of us curious bloggers want to see of him in the girl's undies!