Wednesday, September 06, 2006


tra·di·tion n. 1) The passing down of elements of a culture from generation to generation, especially by oral communication. 2) A mode of thought or behavior followed by a people continuously from generation to generation; a custom or usage. 3) A set of such customs and usages viewed as a coherent body of precedents influencing the present: followed family tradition in dress and manners. 4) A time-honored practice or set of such practices.

One of the men I dated would call my kisses “fire”. My kisses are never the same. Yet is it bad of me to need to receive kisses that are also “fire”, ever changing? You know the kind where you just want something a little different – more/less tongue; left side/right side movement; kisses all over your face – tender, slow, passionate, wanting, teasing; or slow breathing, touching cheek to cheek going slowing from one side of the mouth to the other, stopping only momentarily at the lips before continuing on to the other side of the face.

I think someone has a traditional style to their kisses or sexual activity because they have either never been with a partner that expressed their needs or they never asked their partner what they enjoy. This goes for women as well as men. My response is for people that are in committed relationships. I’m not a therapist and my words should only be taken as one who has talked with many men and women and also read a few books about sex.

You ladies out there that complain about your man being boring – well don’t tell the world – tell your man what you want – show them if you need to. If you can’t express what you want then find a book. I’m not talking S & M, ménage a trois or anything kinky; unless of course that’s what you want and you and your partner have actually talked about this.

I’m just talking about passionate lovemaking that comes from the heart with the energy of your soul. If you have had it, you know what I’m talking about. Have you ever tried touching without touching? Have you ever gotten so close to a person and yet not touched them but just used your imagination and felt the other’s energy before the commencing of stripping. You men out there - you don't need to talk filthy dirty to get what you want but you do at least have to have a voice - grabbing the back of your partner's head and shoving it where you want to go is NOT expressing your needs either.

Anticipation is a wonderful thing. Flirting is a wonderful thing. Quickies in the car on the way to your company Christmas party are a wonderful thing. Suggestive talking/texting is a wonderful thing.

Traditional – just that each has an orgasm. How you get there – use your imagination, ask your partner (they are with you because they want to be – who better to ask what they want as far as pleasure and if it is something you are comfortable with giving/receiving then go for it), or read the Dummies Guide to the Kama Sutra – make your own rules together. Leave history/tradition for religion and politics. As the idiom goes – variety is the spice of life – don't be guided by the clock or what others are or are not doing - add a little spice to your tradition and make a little love for lunch!

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Neil said...

That was great advice... and I'm the type that could use it. From now on, I'm going to cook myself a big breakfast, so when noon comes around, I have more options open for what to do on my lunch hour.

Two Roads said...

Sometimes daylight gives you lots of options you never can see in the darkness of the night.

Paperback Writer said...

Good post.

Sorry, I've been stuck in my work. ;)